007: Funding the DickBanya Spectacular

The sun has set. The moon rises as stars sparkle seductively in the night sky.

In the darkness, the Dickbutts gather to take part in a ritual so secretive that it has been all but erased from the annals of Gooch Island history. Deep in the bowels of New York City, the Dickbutt elite gather for the DickBanya Spectacular.

We arrive to a serene setting, resplendent with piles of the finest caviar and ice cold vodka, candles lighting a glistening pool while the dulcet tones of the harp serenade us as we converse quietly, our bodies quivering with anticipation. At midnight, the ceremony begins. Mist begins to rise from the water as the high priestess summons the spirits of Gooch Island, and a new cannon of Dickbutt lore is revealed in soaring song, transporting attendees to a mystical place that cannot be accessed by mere mortals. Gooch Island is calling, its siren song beckoning lovers of art, math, and culture to its sandy shores. Those who are faithful partake in baptism, purifying their soul and pledging their life to the fulfillment of the prophecy.

As the evening progresses, the vibes become so exquisite that to deny them would be sacrilege.

Following this ritual of purification, the dancing begins. We dance ourselves into a frenzy, fueled by the revelations of the liturgy and the feeling of being reborn, remade, reforged in the waters of Gooch Island. Late into the night, we dance until the sweat rolls down our faces, and then refresh ourselves in the icy embrace of a cold plunge. The philosophers amongst us lounge in the steam room, discussing the mathematical perfection of 1D = 1B. The degenerates suckle the Dickbutt ice luge, first exploring the dick, and then the butt, as ice cold vodka rewards their efforts. And in this fantastic orgy for the senses, we will for a moment experience the wonders that await us on Gooch Island.

Join us to experience a night unlike any other, where the waters of our homeland welcome us in their warm embrace, and the perfection of !math sings to our souls.

Do you dare answer its siren song?

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DAO Request

The Dickbutt Illuminati would like to propose a new event to the DAO - The DickBanya Spectacular! We have secured a private bathhouse in FiDi for the occasion, and have planned a beautiful evening filled with wonder and delight.

We are requesting 69,000 USDC from the DAO to organize this event. At present, we are budgeting for 50,000 in expenses, but some of the “surprise” elements of the evening are still being negotiated, and as always, any overage will be returned in full to the DAO. The event organizers will be contributing significant time, energy, and social capital (at no cost) to ensuring we can deliver the most exquisite event possible in the most cost efficient manner, with no dollar wasted, so we can reach Gooch Island as expeditiously as possible. We plan to offset our expenses with 8,000 in ticket sales (at a cost of 69 USDC per ticket) to ensure registered guests are committed to cumming. This will all be given in full to the DAO as well.

The budget includes the venue fee, light food and drink, sound and light engineering, ambiance and decor, musical talent and performers, and event planning services from the spectacular Amber who organized the finer, more granular details of the Dickbutt Ball.

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How this Benefits the CryptoDickbutt Community

While the Dickscord is the lifeblood of our community, in-person events are a critical venue to support the connections amongst members of our community and to create memorable, highly coveted experiences that drive the legend and lore around CryptoDickbutts as the most sophisticated and most unhinged of all crypto communities.

The Dickbutt Ball, which was partially supported by the DAO as well as a $100 ticket fee from attendees, generated intense FOMO both before and after the event, leading to a spree of buying which more than replenished the resources consumed by the DAO. DAO income > Event Spend. Images from the event resulted in intense engagement across social media and put every other (lame) NFT community event to shame. Stories of the grandeur of the Dickball continue to fill the hearts of other, lesser NFT holders with envy and lust for !dick

The DickBanya, while taking place in a decidedly different market environment, aspires to do the same. We aim to cement the place of the CryptoDickbutt community as the most elite, most sophisticated, and most welcoming. We aim to inspire, titillate, and delight our fellow lovers of art, culture, and math while delivering a feast for the senses that will increase !size and spread love and cheer all around.

CryptoDickbutts are often imitated but never replicated. This event will firmly cement our position as the most magnificant community on the internet and IRL.

Most importantly of all, we love you, our fellow Dickbutters, and we want to fill your hearts with joy, laughter, and warmth from an evening spent in the presence of exquisite and excellent humans who share your love for dicks and butts.

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Managing Tickets and Attendance

Due to capacity constraints, we will manage attendance as follows:

The event registration link will be dropped in the Dickscord first. There will be 69 “first cum, first serve” tickets and 69 merit-based tickets. Once a community member applies for a ticket by sharing their CDB wallet address, their proof of dick will be confirmed and they will be asked to remit the 69 stablecoin ticket fee to the multisig wallet we have set up. The first 69 tickets will be given in the order they come in, pending registration approval. All remaining tickets will be distributed on the basis on contributions to the CDB ecosystem, with all tickets being distributed no later than Friday, April 7, if not earlier, to enable travel plans to be made in a timely fashion. Any tickets that are not paid for will be re-released to the lottery list.

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Questions

This proposal was prepared by Alex, Bas, Meltem, and Pir, the organizers of the Dickbutt Ball. Questions are welcome.